Some days I actually get a chance to talk to people about what I'd like to be doing in the future and to be honest the only real thing I know for sure about it is that I don't want to be working at Wal-mart. It's not the kind of environment I enjoy being in at all. People who slack off are rewarded while the people who work hard every day and push their limits are used to their breaking point and beyond. I'm one of those people who is used for all I'm worth and never given an opportunity to move up or better myself. This is why I don't want to be there anymore.
Now you might say, "but you can find this in any workplace", which is true. Every work place is like a version of high school that you hate and wish you didn't have to be apart. Everyone has their own groups that they hang out with and people they socialize with. Drama is always rampant because you have nothing better to do then talk about your co workers and their lives. Other then work that is.
Most people I work with will know me as a hard worker. I do my job and then I go home because I don't want to be a part of the nonsense that everyone else is dragging around. I don't have time for it. Yet I tend to get caught up in it myself mainly because it involves people that are causing me more work then I already don't like doing. I just don't want to deal with it.
So why am I talking about this? Because I know somewhere out there, there are companies that you can work for that have an actual good environment to work in. There is very little drama and the people you will meet and socialize with will share similar interests and goals as you. I know they are out there because I hear people talk about them all the time and how they love their job and the work they do. Now, this could be because they don't actually tell you about all the stupid things that go on behind the scenes but I like to believe that there are actual places like these in the world.
Again, why am I talking about this? It's the kind of thing I think about on a constant basis. Some days I get thoughts in my head and dwell on them for quite some time until something breaks me out of the stupor and brings me back to reality. The reality that I'm working in a dead end job with almost no hope of getting out. The reality that most people I work with are content with the choice they made in life and just gave up at some point. I don't want to be one of those people so I continue to work on small goals I've made for myself to hopefully get me somewhere someday.
Getting out of that craziness, have you ever been doing something and suddenly feel like you are watching yourself doing that thing. For instance, I was mowing the grass the other day and at one point felt like I was someone else watching me mow the grass. Like an out of body experience. I've been having them more often lately and I'm not sure why. It's been getting more intense too. Maybe it means something or maybe it doesn't. Maybe I'm just so caught up in what I'm doing that I loose control of my senses. Super weird for sure.
Finishing up my book now by wrapping up the final plot thread. I sat at lunch today, furiously writing everything down that I could about what was happening and where it was leading. I couldn't believe it. I took so few breaks while writing and it was such an incredible feeling. I felt like I was actually writing about my characters in a much better with way personalities and connections that I've wanted since starting the book. I hope the trend continues into my editing.
I've decided to write a new post every few days instead of every day as I don't usually have much important to say about just one day in particular. I will still write one post every day if I feel compelled to write about something I'm thinking about but just know that it won't always be every day.
As always, thanks for reading again and I hope to see you in the future.