The future, one day at a time

Some days I actually get a chance to talk to people about what I'd like to be doing in the future and to be honest the only real thing I know for sure about it is that I don't want to be working at Wal-mart.  It's not the kind of environment I enjoy being in at all.  People who slack off are rewarded while the people who work hard every day and push their limits are used to their breaking point and beyond.  I'm one of those people who is used for all I'm worth and never given an opportunity to move up or better myself.  This is why I don't want to be there anymore.

Now you might say, "but you can find this in any workplace", which is true.  Every work place is like a version of high school that you hate and wish you didn't have to be apart.  Everyone has their own groups that they hang out with and people they socialize with.  Drama is always rampant because you have nothing better to do then talk about your co workers and their lives.  Other then work that is.

Most people I work with will know me as a hard worker.  I do my job and then I go home because I don't want to be a part of the nonsense that everyone else is dragging around.  I don't have time for it.  Yet I tend to get caught up in it myself mainly because it involves people that are causing me more work then I already don't like doing.  I just don't want to deal with it.

So why am I talking about this?  Because I know somewhere out there, there are companies that you can work for that have an actual good environment to work in.  There is very little drama and the people you will meet and socialize with will share similar interests and goals as you.  I know they are out there because I hear people talk about them all the time and how they love their job and the work they do.  Now, this could be because they don't actually tell you about all the stupid things that go on behind the scenes but I like to believe that there are actual places like these in the world.

Again, why am I talking about this?  It's the kind of thing I think about on a constant basis.  Some days I get thoughts in my head and dwell on them for quite some time until something breaks me out of the stupor and brings me back to reality.  The reality that I'm working in a dead end job with almost no hope of getting out.  The reality that most people I work with are content with the choice they made in life and just gave up at some point.  I don't want to be one of those people so I continue to work on small goals I've made for myself to hopefully get me somewhere someday.

Reverse Sleep

Trying to redo your sleep schedule is frustrating.  I worked one to ten on Thursday, then was off Friday and then had to go into work today at eight a.m.  I never do well when it comes to getting to bed early so I can try and get some sleep.  I usually end up getting like five hours of sleep.  Now though, I feel tired as all hell and I should be able to get on the right schedule for tomorrow.  Then tomorrow, after work, I'll have to stay up later so I can redo my sleep schedule again for a one to ten work schedule.  This is one of the many perils of working in retail.  If you work in an area that requires two different shift types, expect to have to do this a lot.  Not only that, expect to work a closing shift like one to ten and then have to come in the next morning and work seven to four.  It's the worst thing to ever happen to anyone ever.

Work was pretty uneventful today.  Much easier working during the day then the evening.  There is a lot less stress to get things done during the day and not as much to worry about either.  After another week or so I'll have to worry about even less.  Honestly I'd rather just not be working in retail anymore and move on to something better.  Sadly there isn't much to get into around here so I'm stuck here for now.  Unless this thing with Google works out.

I also worked on the book some more today.  This was the first day that I wrote an edit into the story saying "Fuck this plot, let's do this instead" and wrote something different.  I like this version much better and I managed to get a ton of pages written because of it.  Almost there!

Nothing else to say here today.  Maybe tomorrow I'll have more.  For now there is only sleep.  Thanks again for reading this short post and I hope to see you again in the future.

It's been a few days

At first I thought I might have forgotten to write some posts but it wasn't so much forgetting as it was finding the time.  Then as the days kept going by I realized that I really didn't have much time to actually sit and type something.  But now that my days are starting to even out more and I'm not completely stressed out from work, I can finally work on this again.  So here we go.

On my day off Tuesday I didn't do much of anything.  I actually felt terrible for not doing much more work around the house but I was just exhausted from work still and wanted a day to relax.

Wednesday I went back into the Deli and surprisingly it was much smoother then the past week of working over there.  It could have been the people I worked with or that we had at least five people there instead of four.  It runs a lot better when people are working and there is an actual crew there to keep things running.  My night ended by having to work in Frozen and Dairy, facing Frozen out and stocking milk.  I definitely don't get paid enough for this job.

Five Days

I have finally passed the five day mark.  After today, I will have much less contact with the Deli then when I started covering for them.  The next few weeks I only have a couple days here and there and then I'll be able to head back to my normal place.  It sounds terrible when I say things like this and to those who may read this that I work with in the Deli, I mean nothing against you.  The work there is far to difficult in ways that I don't like dealing with.  It mainly deals with the fact that Wal-mart doesn't know how to hire a proper crew of people to run a place.  Instead they would rather work their hardest workers to the bone and stretch them to their limits while running with the most minimalist group they can find.  Even after getting the new people hired it won't be enough because they won't give them the hours that they need to run the place properly.

I'm to tired for this.

So very tired

This post is much later then I wanted it to be due to an unfortunate series of events.  I didn't have as much time last night then I thought I would before the power just cut off on us for a good two and a half hours.  I then tried to go to bed when it cut off but I had a horrible time staying asleep.  When the power did come back on I got up and turned off all the stuff that came on from earlier and then immediately passed out.  Just when I thought I might have gotten a bit of good sleep, my neighbors annoying car alarm went off and woke me up which caused me to stay awake for the last couple hours of sleep because I couldn't get comfortable again.  It was a terrible morning for sure.

Going to work, I knew it was going to be a bad day because I was pretty drowsy still and I was not disappointed.  Not an hour or so after being there, we got slammed pretty hard and I had to deal with one hell of a lunch rush.  That rush lasted for most of the day and well into dinner rush.  By the end of the night I was exhausted and just wanted to go home.  I was supposed to do a half day in the Deli and then go to Frozen/Dairy but instead they made me stay in the Deli to cover everyone's lunches.  By the end of it I would only have an hour left to spend in Frozen/Dairy so there was no point in going over there. I'm pretty sure management never thinks of it that way though.

I didn't forget!

Anyone who has followed the first couple blog posts may have wondered where this one was.  I didn't forget it and realized I had not written it last night after work right when I had gotten into bed.  I decided it could wait for the morning since I was just so tired last night from work.  This might be shorter then normal due to my morning time constraints but at least there will be something.

Work was tiring.  I forgot how terribly hectic and crowded it can get working in the Deli when there are only two people working during a lunch or dinner rush.  You literally have no time to think at all and unlike other fast food places, you don't have anyone else to help you with things.  So I ended up having to run back and forth from serving food, making food and slicing meat/cheese while the other person filled in wherever I wasn't at.  Surprisingly by the end of the night it had died off significantly which was really strange for a Friday night.  That was also partly a bad thing because with not as much to do my body was starting to catch up with itself and I became tired pretty quickly. 

The drama of small work spaces

I had my first actual full day of work back in the Deli today.  I stressed a lot over going back the past few days, I mean more then I should have, but it actually turned out to be just the same old thing with very minor changes.  One of the things that was still very relevant and still very active was the drama that is created by small groups of people confined in a small work environment.  There is really no reason to have so much drama between so few people that should all be getting along to complete all the work necessary to help everyone get home with very little stress.  But it happens.  Everyday.  And it sucks.  It's mostly due to the fact that some people just don't want to work or people want to lay out the ground rules for what they should be doing and what others should be doing.  If we all did our fair share of work, we could all go home feeling more content but sadly, most days, everyone feels like they are doing far more work then their coworkers.

The big issue that occurred tonight for me that didn't involve the Deli was when my management team was telling me that I needed to check on the stock of milk and eggs for the night.  This is a problem since I was fully enveloped in the work of the Deli and would not be able to find time to go over and stock eggs and milk.  By the time I did get over there to check on it all, the stock of eggs and milk was so bad off that it would have taken me at least another hour and a half to finish it.  I only had thirty minutes left in my night and still hadn't taken a break.  So what did I do?  I half assed stocked milk and said screw eggs because I wasn't going to have time to deal with that mess.